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Are You an Anchor, a Shovel, or a Claw?
Part of Carl Jung’s theory of the duality in all of us is that each woman possesses a male side, known as her “animus”. This animus manifests as the varying ability to say “No”, according to Dr. Patricia Allen, Jungian psychotherapist and author of Getting to “I Do”.
Dr. Allen describes animus as either “an anchor, to take care of her, a shovel, to take care of them, or a claw, to tear people apart.” When a woman says “No” in order
to anchor and take care of herself, she is saying “No” to things that may hurt her or her loved ones physically, emotionally, financially, or in other ways. A woman who is an anchor practices self-love by not going along with anything immoral, unethical or harmful to herself.
Shovel women are those who give and give until they have nothing left for themselves. Perhaps they believe that their generosity will be reciprocated one day; unfortunately, however, others learn only to take from them like vultures that pick meat off a carcass. Children that are mothered/smothered in this way never learn to do for themselves.
Claw women can be ex-shovels who are so fed up and resentful that they seek to kill the souls of those around them with cutting and cruel words. Claws are also those who were raised without limits and who learned to use their beauty, money or power in adulthood to drain others until they die or leave.
Anchoring oneself is the way a woman lets others know that she loves herself enough to say “No” to things that do not feel right. Ultimately, a woman must rely on her instinctive feminine gut to intuit what is comfortable and appropriate, and she must use her animus to take care of her sensitive, feeling self. Telling others “No” does not mean that you love them less, it means that you love yourself enough to not let yourself be used or abused.
Want to learn more? You can purchase Pat Allen’s books off her website, or attend a live seminar around the Los Angeles area. Check her out at www.drpatallen.com